like sand through the hourglass, so are the dollars through my hands

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032109-money

My blogger friend Amy talked about passion and how it fits into your life. Anyone who had read this blog knows I do have a lot of passions. I do not have a problem finding time for my passions, but find it difficult to find balance. One might say I have an addictive personality.

Soon I will be 45. I have a home and a family but I do not have a career, a job, a direction. Nor do I have financial security to indulge in my whims or passions.



In October 2008, I started on the road to healthy living. I have done well and will continue for as long as it takes. Which really means the rest of my life. Hopefully one day I will get to the point where I do not need to count every calorie and look for ways to cut out more calories in order to lose weight. But eating and living healthy are a lifestyle change and I'm OK with that. I had first started down this road back in 2002.

I had read 8 Weeks to Optimum Health: A Proven Program for Taking Full Advantage of Your Body's Natural Healing Power. It really helped me see a better way to live. Fortunately, unfortunately, I soon fell into scrapbooking. I was consumed by it. I felt my creative spirit come back and made new friends. I let myself go, let my house go, I spent way too much money. I began a career as online retailer so that I could save some money on my hobby. I was ignorant and naïve. I found myself with no time to scrapbook and no return on my investment. The economy and malicious hackers made me face reality and close the store down.



Last fall I started to declutter the house. Too many years of indulging in another passion, shopping online, had left the house overflowing with crap. Reading It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff helped me find the motivation I needed to just do it.



Now it's time to address another problem caused by my passions. Money. I have been good and paid my bills on time. But in the last few years, I have spent way too much and need to make a change. I am going to have to do something even worse than dieting or exercise, I am going to have to make a budget and stick with it. I hate the word budget more than I hate the word diet.

With every new interest, one of the first things I do is buy a book, or several. Wait! I shouldn't spend more money to help me save money. I can find free help on the web. But help in setting up a budget is not what I need. I know how to do it. Just like I know how to lose weight and clean up the house. What I need is motivation.

There are lots of people out there who are willing to motivate you to save money. However, their encouragement comes with a price. One of the names that I hear good things about is The Total Money Makeover: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness. I have seen some of his ideas and they make sense. I just never wanted to admit I needed his help. I looked at his site. Oh look! He is having a sale on his books, today only. Only $10 plus $5.95 shipping. Amazon has his book for $15.74. Barnes & Noble has his book for $18.74. There is kindle version and Barnes & Noble has an ebook for $9.99.

(I did order the kindle version. No, I do not own a kindle but their is an free iPhone app I can use. I started reading but instead of feeling motivated, I feel dread and panic and nausea. I have had my head in the sand for a long time. And I am afraid to look.)